There once was a woman named Chris

There once was a woman named Chris

Who always went outside to ____.

        She’d straddle a hole

        Next to the lightpole

Which her male neighbors never seem to miss.

There once was a woman from Canton

There once was a woman from Canton
Who’s breast size was certainly wantin’.
Said one thoughtless knave,
“Why, you’re almost concave.
Go get two fried eggs for transplantin’

There once was a woman from Cleveland

There once was a woman from Cleveland

With breasts that you would not believe, man.

        So big and so round

        With nipples profound;

They’re God’s ultimate mammary achievement.

Limerick Number 900 - There once was a woman named Ashley

There once was a woman named Ashley
Who rued the day that she acted rashly.
Who thought they’d detect her
With the garbage collector
And that they would label her “Trashly.”

There once was a rich man named Jayden

There once was a rich man named Jayden
Who wanted to sleep with a maiden.
Thousands had tried out
But, in pain, none cried out,
‘Til the girl with surgical masquaradin’

There once was a stallion named Billy

There once was a stallion named Billy
Who fancied himself as a filly.
They thought him insane
When he braided his mane,
With his saddle all sequined and frilly.

There once was a woman named Jullie

There once was a woman named Jullie
A too-cool-for-school kind of foolie,
Because Jule would fool
With any fool’s tool
Including the tool of yours truly.

There once was a woman from Hicking

There once was a woman from Hicking
Who ran naked, spinning and kicking,
Shouting with each twirl,
“I am a bad girl.
God knows I deserve such a licking.”

There once was a woman named Tracy

There once was a woman named Tracy
Who everyone thought of as spacy,
Due to vribating balls
In her vaginal walls
Which kept her distracted like crazy.